A hotel break with young children can be a genuine treat: someone else makes the beds, the pool is already warm, and nobody has to decide what to cook. It can also unravel quickly if a four-year-old has nothing to do between 4pm and bedtime. The trick is not to over-schedule your stay, but to think ahead about the small things — what goes in the bag, where the nearest playground is, and what time the restaurant actually starts serving dinner. Get those right and everyone, including the guests in the next room, has a much better time.

Ask the right questions before you book

A few minutes on the phone or on the booking form can save a whole evening of stress. Hotels are used to family requests, but they can only help if you tell them what you need.

• Meal times: ask whether the restaurant offers an early family sitting, usually between 5pm and 6.30pm, and whether you can reserve a table rather than queue.
• Room position: request a room away from the lift shaft, function suites and any bar with live music. A quiet corner of the building is worth more than a view.
• Layout: check whether interconnecting rooms, a family suite or a sofa bed are available, and confirm whether a travel cot fits comfortably once it is set up.
• Practical kit: ask about high chairs, bed guards, stair gates, baby baths and whether a fridge can be provided for milk and snacks.
• Facilities and timings: find out when the pool is quietest, whether there are shallow or toddler splash sessions, and what the hotel's quiet hours are after 10pm.

Pack a boredom-busting bag

The single most useful thing you can bring is a small bag of activities that only comes out at the hotel. Novelty does most of the work. A pack of playing cards takes up almost no space and covers snap, pairs, rummy and simple counting games; add a couple of dice and a notepad and you have hours of entertainment at a table in the corner of the lounge.

• Two or three card games, kept in a zip-up pouch so nothing escapes under the bed.
• A magnetic travel game or a small puzzle book, ideal for restaurant waiting time.
• Stickers, a blank notebook and a few crayons — the pack of crayons the restaurant provides rarely lasts.
• A familiar blanket, pillow or soft toy, which helps a strange room feel like somewhere to sleep.
• Refillable water bottles, a few wrapped snacks and a small first-aid pouch with plasters and children's paracetamol.

Rotate the contents rather than tipping everything out at once. Bring out one item at a time, and hold a couple back for the moment when patience is genuinely running thin.

Scout out nearby green space before you arrive

Children need to run, and a hotel corridor is not the place for it. Before you travel, spend five minutes looking at a map of the area around your hotel for parks, playing fields, canal towpaths or country parks within walking distance. A playground ten minutes away is worth far more than an attraction half an hour's drive away, because you can use it twice a day without any planning.

Pack a lightweight ball, a frisbee or a skipping rope, and keep a spare pair of socks and a waterproof in the day bag. In Britain, a spell of rain is always a possibility, so check whether there is an indoor option too — a local museum with a hands-on gallery, a leisure centre with a soft play session or simply a large shopping centre with space to walk. Note opening times and whether you need to book ahead, particularly during school holidays.

Get mealtimes working for you, not against you

Hungry children and a 7.30pm table booking are a difficult combination. Wherever possible, eat early. An early sitting means the kitchen is quieter, the food arrives faster and you can be back in the room for bath and stories before overtiredness sets in. If the hotel does not open until later, ask whether you can order from the bar menu, arrange a picnic in your room, or have something simple plated for the children at 5pm while you eat properly afterwards.

Keep a small snack supply in the room for the gap between swimming and dinner, and don't be shy about asking for a table in a corner where a bit of fidgeting will not disturb anyone. A colouring book and a packet of cards on the table make the wait far more bearable for everyone, including the diners at the next table.

Protect the evening wind-down

Holiday excitement is real, and it usually peaks just as you want everyone to settle. Try to keep the shape of your normal bedtime routine: bath, pyjamas, a story, lights low. Bring the book you are reading at home, and keep the television off if you can — screens tend to wind children up rather than down in an unfamiliar room.

Be considerate of other residents, too. Corridor running, bedroom door slamming and loud screens after 10pm are the fastest way to earn a glare at breakfast. A quiet word with children before you go up, a pair of headphones for tablets and a white-noise app on your phone can all help. If your child does wake in the night, a pre-packed bag with a drink and a snack means you can settle them without switching on every light in the room.

None of this requires a huge amount of planning. A short list of questions, a well-stocked activity bag and a bit of local knowledge will keep young guests happy, leave you free to enjoy the break, and make you the kind of hotel visitors who are genuinely welcome back.